If your grated jeans are small

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Everyone remembers the epic unsuccessful attempts of the heroine of the video about the laputens to squeeze into the famous delightful pants. And, probably, it’s good that the creators of the video didn’t know that it was possible to squeeze a couple of three centimeters a day in the thighs, as they say, without dust and noise. And everything is so elementary and easy that the main exhibit at the Van Gogh exhibition would have lost the lion’s share of comedy and entertainment, if this method were reflected in the script.

All emergency means: fasting, vomiting and laxative, sauna or food film, exhausting physical exertion, which work great for reducing the abdomen, suffer a complete fiasco when it comes to the hips.

That's because lymph, fibrous matrix (the very “orange peel”), fatty tissue of the buttocks and thighs — all these substances change very slowly. Lymph flows at a rate of 1.5 liters per day, months require months to absorb the fibrous matrix, and fat on the thighs, which helps produce estrogens, lives for many years, until menopause doesn’t save adipose tissue from this tribute. In 24 hours it is possible to stir up this stable system only if you are well aware of the laws of hemodynamics and the peculiarities of the excretory system. But to make the legs swollen in a few hours each is capable of, literally once or twice or three.

Dark-haired girl looks at a hamburger

Triple taboo for beauties with lush hips

Do not starve

The worst idea is to arrange a fasting day before an important date. Of course, a low calorie diet will help make the stomach more flat, and thoughts more rapid. Psychologists, by the way, recommend that businessmen go to hungry meetings at important meetings in order to sharpen their intuition and literally smell money. But if during the day to eat less than 20 grams of protein, there will be the so-called osmotic edema. From hunger really swell up - this is not a metaphor, but a statement of fact.

An exceptionally protein dietary day is again not an option - to feed the brain, on protein diets, the liver will begin to synthesize glucose from protein and ketone bodies from fat. This will give the skin secretions a disgusting hydrogen sulphide odor and a breathtaking acetone to the breath.

Do not strain

The desire to appear before a chosen one and athletic pushes many to exploits: an exercise bike, squats with a barbell, a hundred foot swings, and, please, wild fatigue, clogged legs, and the next day as a result of the breakdown of glycogen in the tissues water will appear (after a hard workout up to 2-3 liters of fluid are formed). And not only that the legs will get some elephantiness, after a day, just at the time of the desired meeting, the muscles will start to hurt so that you will have to forget about sexual defilement from picture to picture on 20-centimeter labutenes.

Do not worry

Convulsively picking up outfits and scrolling through the future of highly intelligent dialogues in your head, remember: a strong nervous tension blocks the excretory processes, which means the fluid will accumulate, and the jeans will have to be buttoned again using obscene vocabulary and a strong mother's hand. Unfortunately, this is not the only surprise. In the first half hour of the meeting, when the mandrass subsides, the diuresis will increase and you will have to choose those parts of the exposition that are closer to the toilet.

So now, gloomily put on baggy pants, the lightning of which is surprisingly bristling on the stomach, and the shapeless ass hints that you know more about Van Gogh than about the relationship between a man and a woman, and go to the opening day alone? Watching Serega the Prince triumphantly stroking the angular thigh of another more fortunate beauty — no, thank you, acquaintance with the fairy. Physiology has not let anyone down yet!

The girl hugged a pillow in a dream

Magical ritual to reduce the hips

Do not be nervous and sleep

Herbal sedatives, herbal teas, aromatherapy, yoga, massage, attentive reading of the page in Wikipedia on Van Gogh - this is how a decent girl should spend the evening before an important date.

Before going to bed, under the mattress, put in the legs, no, not a pea or men's trousers, as fortune tellers and fortunetellers advise, but just a blanket rolled up so that the height of the foot end is 10-15 cm higher than the head end. This will improve the venous outflow almost by forty percent, and legs noticeably build up.

Take a bath

With the first rays do a light workout and take a salt bath temperature of 37-39 degrees. It is important to dive to the chin. What happens in just a couple of minutes is called immersion. Peripheral veins are compressed, the blood moves more easily to the right atrium, which is slightly stretched, together with the excitation of skin receptors on the chest, this signals the brain to secrete a special hormone that enhances urination. That is why in the pools so many people behave uncivilized, especially children - they are simply not able to resist the reflex. An hour later, the fluid will be removed more actively, not only the swelling of the legs will disappear, but the bags under the eyes will also improve mobility in the joints and in the spine.

Legs up !!!

The final gloss on the built legs will bring another procedure. You can get to know her if you look behind the scenes during bodybuilding competitions. The amazing picture that appears to the inexperienced eye is striking - a dozen muscular men are lying on the floor, their pumped up legs, and looking at the ceiling melancholically.

It is they who dry their legs, causing an outflow of lymph under the influence of gravity, after 15 minutes they will take to the stage, striking the audience and judges with a clear relief of each muscle on the hips and legs. A date is no less crucial moment: there is a judge and spectators, so it’s worth to lie down before him for ten minutes with your legs raised, the diameter of your hip will probably decrease by a couple of centimeters.

And in pursuit of a purely female cunning: use compression tights, but not the ones that are sold in lingerie stores. In orthopedic salons a large selection of compression anti-varicose knitwear. It is worth warning: it’s not so easy to pull this technological miracle on your feet, and you can shoot the next clip, which will be no less popular than Labuthenes, but the result is worth it - jeans are two sizes smaller than fit. And, voila, we conquer the fan with beauty, perhaps with intellect, sense of style and so on and so forth ...

Women's legs in white jeans and high heels

But remember, Cinderella, these are emergency measures!

Cramped jeans, high heels, alcohol, long standing in one place, after all, the Van Gogh exhibition has something to admire - a demonic set of factors for the speedy destruction of the venous system and lymph stagnation. After four hours, slender beauty runs the risk of becoming a swollen pumpkin. And if you give vent to fantasy and imagine that the date smoothly turned into a romantic night ...

Somewhere at dawn, the beautiful prince finally pulled the crystal labuten from the swollen limb of her beloved and leaned helplessly on the pillow, wondering how to remove the princess from compression tights, without resorting to magic and the help of the EMERCOM ...

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